restrain me

Somewhere on facebook is a certain wall post which reads, "... are you staying a little longer to get pictures?i m thinking of staying till the 22nd or 23rd and going tothe slums/squatter like places to get a few shots;it'll be really interesting!"

and it's a furious trembling inside.

So you're going to the philippines to participate in their ultimate frisbee tournament. But "the slums/ squatter like places" are .not. bits of tin and wood tacked together for you to take pictures of.
These sites of depravation and poverty are .not. your camera's playground to whore out.
These spaces where mothers and fathers despair of earning even a pittance are .not. for your whim and fancy to "get a few shots"
to upload into your flicker account to show off your photography skills.

They are not. exotic lesser humans whose homes you can vouyuer. snoop around with the 18-200 VR you borrowed. Their lives are not for you to romanticise into blank-and-white stills or monochromes.

They don't choose to live in a slum. They don't decide that the best they can afford will be corragated iron situation beside a river of filth. They aren't living in rickety structures that might collapse soon for want of a few pesos for you with the 18-200 VR. No, not you.

These are homes of pain borne out of man's corruption and they are real. They suffer because of corpulent, abhorrent government officials who siphon money. These are actual families and they are real. Mothers who borrow desperately to make ends meet, fathers who drink and gamble, wide-eyed children in rags- Because of man's evil and not placed there for you to take artistic photos.

Are you going to change their lives?
Are you taking "a few shots" to champion their cause?
Are you doing this because you plan to make a difference?

"i m thinking of staying till the 22nd or 23rd and going tothe slums/squatter like places to get a few shots;it'll be really interesting!"

uhh

it wasn't rachel who washed her hair with facial soap, by the way.

yay.

yay. i like seeing everybody again :)

i am thinking all that has been heard the past three nights is much worth thinking about.
i begin to wonder about communism.

anyhow. i so smart i tried to wash my hair with facial soap. things the muddled brain does.

decidedly happy.

hello. shieng say nobody writes anymore.

today i realised how we need to thank God, for Him in life. if we really think abt it, He has guarded our paths and there is really nothing that lies outside His giving to us.

yea, so thank God for reminders of Him. it is a challenge to keep getting closer to Him and the mission field, and time is catching up on us so fast. soon we need to think about yet another step.

anyhow. its gonna be the 19th again. and the next ft is next next tuesday the 16th i think. so we can either meet then or set another date.

ta.

only because

the atl ordered a post out of me. I know it's neither an intellectual post nor missionary focussed nor even related to the team; it's just a rambling of sorts. Really. anyway it's past midnight I want to sleep.

___________________
on wednesday

I'm sitting in el class [the better one, at least] and without warning my mind suddenly transmits a different vision- and just as abruptly back to the present again. I was a little dazed- as dazed as one can be while feeling sleepy and not/concentrating at the same time. Then for some reason the place my memory plonked me into for the timebreath of a second became important, and I rewound the reel. to realise that my brain had brought me back to a surroundings of whitewashed houses with the afternoon sun upon their walls. I know the memory. I was in the philippines, and we had just come down from the mountains. We had crossed a dammed river to get to those houses [there was a dam on the river- nothing else], so that our sandals were soaked and I was exhilarated at the mini adventure we'd just gone through.

These days then I think back on the philippines it seems my memories are somewhat sepia singed, a sense of an exotic adventure. Walking along slums along streets hitching rides bouncing on the jeepneys unique to that land. Has my reality been lost.

Another note- more to keep myself awake than anything. Last night when a dear friend said "thanks for missing me" I knew exactly what he meants. You're precious to me and I to you, but it takes a certain effort to step out and say it. for me anyway. Most times I'd rather send mental emails to someone I miss and want to be with, useless because mental telepathy works only when God does it. Still, I'd rather do that because I find it hard to make myself vulnerable.

TO OUR BELOVED TL...

Grey.

Creation.

But most times, we see creation and mission through tinted lenses.

How do we come under God's scrutiny and refinement,
so we see things in its pristine form?

Then run.


And finish the race for His glory.

Mission exists because our God is a missionary God who sends His people to be a blessing to all mankind.

At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure.

"All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows who the Son is except the Father, and no one knows who the Father is except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him."

Luke 10:21-22

Christ had a profound sense of mission grounded in the assurance of a relationship with God as loving Father, and such assurance comes with joy from the Holy Spirit.

Us?